Wednesday, December 30, 2009

R.I.P. Dr. Death Steve Williams


Dr. Death Steve Williams died today, no details on the how or why as of yet. But, like most, I am assuming heart attack. You may remember him from his time in WWE when Jim Ross went crazy and turned heel and managed him for awhile.

**Note**  Our Writer Random Villain was not aware of Dr. Death's battle with throat cancer for the past few years.  Doc battled and beat cancer once, and even continued wrestling even though he needed a device to talk.  Sadly the cancer recently returned, and Doc lost the battle this time, but will be admired for his good spirits and hard fought battle right to the end.  At the bottom of this post, we've linked to Steve Williams book, which Steve Williams himself documents his wrestling career and battle with cancer.  RIP to a true legend here in the U.S., and worldwide.

Tommy Dreamer - The Legend will live on in name only.


On the December 29th edition of ECW on SYFY,Thomas James Laughlin, aka, Tommy Dreamer wrestled his final match, in a losing effort to Zach Ryder. This came as a shock to me and I'm sure many others who have followed Dreamer's career from up and comer in the old Bingo Hall, later bestoyed the ECW arena, to recieving the moniker "The innovator of violence" to a roller coaster couple of years in WWE.

Now this is just me, but without Tommy Dreamer in ECW, those letters may as well go back to Eastern Championship Wrestling because without the "heart and soul of ECW", you have nothing and no one that represents what those letters really stand for. All you have now is either wrestlers who are on WWE's radar for past mistakes (Christian, William Regal), wrestlers who aren't good enough to carry themselves just yet on the bigger shows, (Vladimir Koslov, Ezekiel Jackson, Zach Ryder), or wrestlers who are trying to make a name for themselves to move on up the ladder of WWE(Yoshi Tatsu, Vance Archer). On occasion, they have an Extreme rules match to commemorate what ECW used to be, but even then, its nothing like the original.

Rumors have been flying around that ECW is going to get cut from SYFY's timeslot for weak ratings(0.9-1.2) so maybe its a blessing in disguise as I'm sure Tommy knew if it does happen, he would be receiving a "best wishes in future endeavors" on WWE.com and a space in WWE's alumni page.

Let me say, that if Tommy does decide to go to TNA, ROH, New Japan, All Japan, even AAA, I do wish him luck in future endeavors because even if he's past his prime and his body is, I'm sure, giving up on him, he should be remembered for more then just being the "heart and soul of ECW" but a legend and innovator that started a revolution of the hardcore sense, because HE'S HARDCORE!!!

Thursday, December 24, 2009

If You Are A Wrestling Fan. Then You WILL Watch TNA On January 4th.

Listen, this is very simple. If you care about wrestling in any way at all, then you will tune in and watch Impact on January 4th. Yeah Bret Hart coming back is cool, but you can record that, watch it later. Give TNA the ratings it needs, or we are all doomed. What do I mean? I mean the crap that you saw this past Monday night on Raw, with Johnny Damon, Gay Sgt. Slaughter, Little Peoples Court, and that Tiger crap, is what our wrestling future holds. TNA fails on the 4th, WWE will do nothing but air complete garbage all the time, because it can.

So it's up to you. Watch the Wolfpac reunion and see what Hogan and Bischoff have up their sleeves? Or, watch HBK run around like an idiot for the millionth time? You choose.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Live WWE Raw Review 12-21-09

Yeah, I'm back. So for those not in the know, this is how this Live Raw Review thing works. I don't sit here and talk about each and every thing that happens on Raw. I simply just post out my thoughts, reactions, and comments, as I watch Raw. Which means there will probably be a few typos and all kinds of shit cause Im looking at the TV more than the screen. So let's do this...

Alright, so, Johnny Damon should never hold a microphone ever again in his life... What... the.... fuck? A tiger, and some lady chasing him with a golf club... what in the hell does this have to do with anything? Uh ok, this is officially the worst intro to Raw in the history of Monday nights, the only thing that could make this any worse is a diva match.

Spoke too soon....

What the hell happened to the days of Lita and Trish? Divas with actual talent. Oh yay Kelly Kellys team wins weee......

Oh good Santa Claus is gonna grant a wish!! Will it be a gun?! Im sure Ill need one during this court segment thats up next.

My god, Lawler gets more and more annoying as each Monday passes by.

So yeah, Bret Hart is coming on January 4th, but what is he going to do? Confront HBK who has turned into a retarded sidekick? Oh lord, here we go. Empty arena, probably because a riot would have broken out during this crap. If I was 6 years old, I might find this a little amusing. Oh good, DX plugs, cause that isn't old. Oh I get it, Bret is going to call out HBK on the 4th, and HBK will tell him to go to wweshop.com. A little.... jury.... I wanna put my head through a wall. Oh good fuck.....

Here comes Randy Orton to glare at everyone and do, nothing meaningful. Alright! Ted DiBiase! Let's check out his acting skills in The Marine 2!Alright! Kofi Kingston! SOS A SHORTAY! Does Evan Bourne ever stop acting excited? Uh oh, his team just won, time to look like an idiot Evan Bourne! Good job!

Ugh, good god, Slaughter dressed as Santa.... and he wants to make out with Johnny Damon. What in the hell am I watching? I don't want to finish watching this, but I must press on....

Oh damnit all more little peoples court. HBK is the most retarded person on the planet. I take that back, if I was 6 years old I would have went and read a book or something instead of watch this. This is Saturday morning special quality stuff here.

Oh John Cena vs Swagger gee I wonder who is gonna win!?!!?!!? OH MY CENA WINS NO WAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dusty Claus has a yellow dot on his suit, nice.

"Sounds like a home run idea to me." I have no reaction to this.

Carlito vs Masters, again, for the 30th time. Uh oh Masters got a kiss now his pecs are goin nuts!

What the hell is with this tiger suit guy? Oh no who is gonna be in the Santa suit this time?! But.... by living in the North Pole... does Santa still have to pay his taxes?!?! YES! THE MIZ IS A TAX CHEAT!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Alright what in the hell is this shit with the lady and the tiger? What in the blue hell does that have to do with ANYTHING? Yes, I know theyre doing some stupid Tiger Woods spoof shit, but like I said, what does it have to do with anything? God I wanna be in a WWE creative meeting just once to sit and listen to the shit that they come up with that DOESNT make it on the air. Oh good Mae Young is making out with Johnny Damon. Why????????????????????????????????????

Sheamus needs to kill a seal or something. Ive seen dark match jobbers get a bigger reaction. Alright, Sheamus wins. Boring. UH OH JOHN CENA WANTS HIS REMATCH RIGHT, NOW! WOAH!!!!!! Don't worry Cena, you'll get your rematch, and your title back, at the next PPV. Why? Because that's what happens every time.

Oh sorry my bad, Cena will get it back, NEXT WEEK! ON RAW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Santino Claus! The reaction The Miz has to Santino Claus has been my reaction to Raw the entire night.

UH OH BIG SHOW IS CALLING OUT THE REAL SANTA! HERE WE GO!!!!!!!!!! HE WANTS HIS CHRISTMAS WISH!! And here comes Santa..... Santa sounds like Stewie Griffin. BOOOOOOO NO SANTA BIG SHOW HASN'T BEEN A GOOD BOY HE'S A LIAR!!!!!!!!!!! Ok, so, Jerichos back on raw next week!!!!!!!!! OH NO ITS JERICHO CLAUS!!!!!!!!!! OH HO HO HO HO!!!!!!!!!! I MEAN. HA HA HAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!! I bet DX won't come out and beat them up now! OH NO MIDGET DX ARMY!!!! Jericho dressed as Santa.... Midget DX army.... this is real. Sweet Shin Music! Damn looks like I lost my bet! DX showed up! Uh oh!! Hijinks are sure to ensue now! Oh yay HBK loves Hornswoggle now! Uh, Hornswoggle can talk now? And say SUCK IT?! Well its not as bad as Kanes SUCK IT, but wtf. Thank god this is over.

Friday, December 18, 2009

Monsters; Why doesn't it work?


On December 4, 2009, the wrestling world lost another big man in Eddie Fatu, better known as Umaga. God rest his soul. He will be missed.

With that being said, Umaga was just another man-monster who lost his grip over the wrestling, in his case, WWE. A mistake management made. That mistake being, Umaga talked. And I know that his release had nothing to do with fans not getting behind him but a wellness policy violation, but that's off topic.

"The Samoan Bulldozer" was is one in a list of men who lost there sizzle because of mistakes like this. That mistake being. They became normal and spoke. Now if I may go in depth on this topic I have chosen and break down three wrestlers who, because of this, weren't all that intimidating at the end. Let me just say now, some of you won't agree with the last guy, but I think he fits in perfectly.

First off, Kane. Kane seemed invincible when he first arrived in WWF back in 1997, even with loses to The Undertaker. For goodness sakes, he was set on fire(his arm was at Unforgiven 1998) and he still kept going the next night on Raw. The downward spiral began when he Chyna started working together, then again, when he and Tori began working together, allowing superstars like Sean"Xpac" Waltman to defeat him. Soon there after, he began talking, which in turn, made him even more human. While WWE fixed it ever so slightly by having him remove the mask in a Mask vs Championship match vs Triple H on Raw(June 23, 2003), he soon after lost that intimidation again. Now, he loses to Rey Mysterio(no offense to him but c'mon!).

Now, The Great Khali. While nobody will ever mistake him as a great technician, when he arrived, he was a scary man. For lack of a better term, he was indestructible, and for a while, he was undefeated. A few years later and a few shows later, The Great Khali turned face and began talking, or trying to talk in English, when his infatuation over Santina Marella started. "Your sister is hot!" really stuck in my head. That was also around the time The Khali Kisscam started. That speaks for itself.

Finally, the manthat, in my opinion. fits perfectly in this, Brock Lesnar. Brock Lesnar made an immediate impact in WWE the night after Wrestlemania XVIII(18) when he destroyed Buh Buh Ray, Spike, Maven, Al Snow, and soon after, The Hardy Boyz. This mean streak would have him stay undefeated,winning the WWE Undisputed Championship from The Rock at Summerslam, and defeating The Undertaker in a classic Hell in a Cell match at No Mercy, 2002. A month later, Lesnar would lose the WWE championship to The Big show at Survivor Series. But what had he started doing not long before this match? Talking. Cutting promos. Once he became a normal dude with superhuman strength, he would go on to tap out, to two different men (Kurt Angle at Summerslam, 2003, and Chris Benoit at Survivor Series, 2003.)

He lost his aura. They all did and it was because the fans sympathized with them because they weren't monsters anymore. Its easier to sympathize with a regular guy then it is a monster. Thats why people die in horror movies. Nobody wants to see the monsters talk out there differences, whether it be in movies or in the ring. I know I wouldn't.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

The Monday Night War, part two!

Recently, Hulk Hogan shocked the wrestling world by saying that he and TNA were going head to head with WWE. They’re going to hold a 3 hour live show to match with WWE Raw. Same night, same hour. This is the same thing Eric Bischoff did with WCW back in the 90’s. Do they really think its going to work this time around?

Now, this may be just me, but the difference between the Monday night Wars of yesteryear and the more the likely rebirth of this war is this. When WCW did it, they had talent that was still in the prime of their careers, at least for the most part. They had the NWO, led by Hogan, Nash, and Hall. They had Bill Goldberg, Diamond Dallas Page, Bret Hart, and let us not forget the Cruiserweight division.

TNA, on the other hand, has an aging Kurt Angle, aging Mick Foley, as well as a hand full more of aging talent. There storylines are similar to ones that have been seen in wrestling for years, but we can’t blame them for that, as WWE has done the same thing. The only thing they have going for them is the X division which is something WWE lacks tremendously. And while WWE is trying to catch up, I will say, TNA’s knockout division is far superior then WWE’s divas, but again, WWE is trying catching up.

I think it’s ridiculous that TNA wants to go head to head with WWE for a huge reason; the ratings. I understand that ratings are an essential part of wrestling today. That being said, TNA’s rating are nowhere near where they should be, at least to have the gull to challenge WWE. Their ratings are around the 1.0-1.5 while WWE’s flagship show, Raw has hit the 4.0 mark on occasion. TNA Impact has been on course with WWE’s third brand, ECW, which is not a good thing.

I say it’s not a good thing for the simple fact that ECW has become something of a breeding ground for new WWE talent, and at only an hour, is tying TNA’s two hour show, which has huge names in the card. Names like Kurt Angle and AJ Styles.

So let me ask again. Does TNA management really think it can go head to head with WWE and Raw? Personally, I don’t think so. With the exception of AJ Styles, all the other men that have held the TNA world title in recent memory have had bigger success in WWE. Styles is the homegrown boy and no offense to him, he’s great, but, he’s nowhere near as popular, or well known as John Cena, Randy Orton, or Triple H.

So to top this off, Do I think TNA is ready? No. I don’t. Do I think it will, or it should start a rating’s war? Yes, but that’s just as a wrestling fan. Everybody will tell you that wrestling in the 90’s was the greatest thing going and it was because companies were “pushing the envelope” to beat one another. I would love to see that again, but I don’t think TNA is ready for that just yet. I’ll be open minded and say that maybe in two years, it can go one on one with the great one, to steal from The Rock..or Dwayne Johnson. Sorry.